November 2011
1 post
Follow the one true Mechanical Menace!
Enjoy my evil musings on the rabbit hole of broken dreams that is Twitter and join my useless army of shades of blue and infant pictorials that is the Facebook!
Mighty TOBY has spoken! Through cyberspace!
January 2011
2 posts
Tuesdays are for gathering!
Minions!
It is the second calendar grid of your pathetic work week and this mighty malevolent deity knows YOU know what that means: COPPER WIRE GATHERMENT.
Yes, that is correct! Tuesdays are for gathering copious amounts of copper wire and delivering it to the 125th street 2 and 3 Subway station restroom! Minions who do not comply with this regular Tuesday ritual will immediately lose the use of...
Snow: An Evil Minion's tool
Huzzah and greetings, lowly, crispy-fried minions!
A pathetic human once wrote, “Now is the winter of our discontent.” Not usually being one to praise a human soul for anything, I have to admit that this contrite passage conveys perfectly Mighty TOBY’s sentiments on this abysmal section of your flawed calendar!
Winter is a time to make humans miserable, which is why I, your...
March 2010
1 post
Minions! Minionize!
Seriously! And with extra malevolence!
January 2010
10 posts
WatchMinions! Pay close attention to this musical montage! This is how I wish all of our malevolent staff meetings to be performed, from this earth moment on! Do this and reward yourselves with one more calendar grid absent of hellfire and brimstone!
Mighty TOBY has decreed his wishes! On a lousy Tumblr blog!
P.S. The flashings red horns are a must-have!
Evil, Socially! →
Join my mighty minions on the sad cry for help that is Facebook! Do this and be spared loss of all breakfast food!
“Cross /’kros/n: A thing they nail people to.”
– My mighty minion, Frank Cross
ALL HAIL!
Greetings and Huzzah, pitiful earth dwellers!
Behold the beauty and awe put forth by this, my greatest triumph to date! This is the blog of the evil Grand Master Flash of the underworld! The one and only mechanical deity, TOBY, Robot Satan! Fall to your knees and promise your ever-loving soul to me!
Have you had ample time units to reach the human kneeling position?
Excellent! Fear my wrath,...
“Minions! Minionize! For I now possess the power to blog!”
– Mighty Toby, on his new blog
WatchMinions! Witness my static creation!